Continuation of October 20, 2016, post – My yearlong prayer and Suzanne’s growing faith.
I knew what everyone else thought but I wanted to hear from my Creator. The One who formed me and knows me by my name. My question/prayer. It was about a remedy for the on-going darkness which first came upon me when I was eight or nine years old. I never told anyone about it (the anxiety, etc…) until I was in my late twenties. Somewhere around that time, I started counseling and a few years later, I agreed to try an anti-depressant. Then, medication for anxiety, sleeping pills, natural remedies including a lightbox – “Happy Light” (simulated the light of the sun), etc…
For about a year before Suzanne brought me my ‘special delivery message’ from God, I had been praying the same prayer over and over. My prayer (part 1): “LORD, I don’t know what to do. I know what everyone else thinks but I want to know Your answer. You made me, You know everything about me, I want Your answer. Please reveal to me what I should do about my depression (I no longer call the old darkness “my” depression!). Should I continue to take my pills, is there a natural remedy that can help me? Are You going to heal me? I need to hear from You, Lord Jesus; I want Your answer.” My prayer (part 2) – “Use me, LORD.”
I prayed that prayer at night, on my living room floor (I still feel closest to Jesus praying on the floor) not knowing when or how He would answer, but with the full assurance from the promises of His Word, that He would answer! (Psalm 50:15).
Then came March 14, 2007, at 12:40 and 3:10 (see October 20, 2016, post). I now had an answer to my prayer! I was very surprised. Not surprised that God had answered, but how and from whom the answer came. As I explained before, at the time Suzanne and I had a working relationship only. She did not know anything about my prayer. She knew no personal details about my life. She wasn’t going to church and hadn’t read a bible since she was a little girl. She did though, have grandparents who she had heard pray for her many times as a young girl.
In the twelve months that followed, Suzanne became very curious about the Bible and about the God who spoke to her that March evening in her kitchen. She started to read the Bible, she asked many questions as she searched to find the truth. My new friend also started to come to a weekly prayer meeting at Yale with other Yale employees and graduate students. There, she would intercede in prayer for her family, co-workers and her friends.
On Thursday, March 6, 2008, Suzanne called me with the good news. One day earlier that week, she was shaking out a rug on her porch. As she thanked the LORD for the beautiful day, He said to her: “Wouldn’t it be even more beautiful today if You accepted me as your LORD and Savior?” She said, “Yes, LORD.” 🙂